Brazil Brazil Restaurant 330 West 46th Street New York, NY 10036

You'd think that maybe the fact that we were at a Brazilian restaurant, but seeing things like caesar salad and risotto on the menu would have tipped us off that we could probably find somewhere better to eat, but sadly no. We went in. We did get the outdoor table we requested, seated next to an arrangement of dusty, tacky, pastel, fake flowers on a wire pushcart. The paper tablecloth on our table was marked with the drinks of the previous diners, but did that bother us, nahhhh. We had food on our minds and could overlook stuff like that for the time being. The walls were painted a horrific shade of salmon, but still, we kept our hopes high that perhaps we would be pleasantly surprised. After all, the place was packed- with a line of people outside waiting for tables to open up.
A basket of italian bread was left for us by our gruff waiter, who pretty much just walked away when we said we'd just stick with tap water. He came back to take our orders a little while later - a goat cheese salad to share, a glass of sangria (which, incidentally wound up being the ONE remotely Brazilian thing on our table) Pasta primavera for my mother and grilled tilapia with vegetables for me. Mysteriously, on the side of my fish sat a weird pile of chickpeas and alfafa sprouts. Is THAT supposed to be Brazilian? I'm so confused. So, okay, the food was boring, but not terrible. Definitely not Brazilian though. But wait! Is it perhaps Brazilian to add some chef's hair to the broccoli? AH! That must be it! Actually. No. I don't think ANYTHING can justify or explain that. It's just F-ing GROSS. When I told the waiter about it, he simply took the plate away. No "I'm so sorry." No "Is there possibly anything else that I can bring for you?" Nope. No words at all. He did however, not charge us for the hairy broccoli, so I guess that's a plus.
Going to theater? Eat ANYWHERE else.